AMAZING AMUSEMENT

I can see you smile
On the other side of the screen
Although you can’t see me though

And you don’t even know that
I can see you from where I am

I understand that you are now better off without me
Although it is not an easy thing to accept

I also know that you have always tried to
Hide some moments of truth from me
For reasons that only you know best

Yet I stand here to watch you laugh
At the humor that merrily surrounds you

I humbly admit that I did not possess
The qualities that you may have been looking for

Which you may have now succeeded in finding
In somebody else
Who has proved to be

The better man
With a bigger world
Filled with beautiful options
To keep you happy forever

Surely it is
A way better option
Than my worthless heart
That only pulsates
To know that

You are fine

:: Mark of Respect ::

Friendship, love & companionship are all blessings from above. These are heavenly attachments that cannot be created or broken when one wishes to. They simply seem to happen and we are often left caught unaware of such happenings.

At times we even fail to realize and understand that we are already far more deeply attached to the ones we are connected to, than the deep blue sea. We only start feeling we are suddenly in the middle of nowhere when the person we are closely attached to is no longer available.

These three genres of relationships do not come with a price tag because they are priceless. They are also irreplaceable. The vacuum left by the absence of a loved one shall forever tend to remain explicitly empty during one’s lifetime.

Coming together in life and later to part away is nature’s way of teaching us that this world is a “Transit Station” and that we shall all have to let go and move on sooner or later.

It is due to this acceptance of harsh reality that I wish to thank everyone today as a Mark of Respect for being with me all this time through ups & downs, good & bad times and all the sad & happy moments tasted together…

Out of all my friends, I wish to take this opportunity to thank a very special friend who has played an extraordinary role in my life. Praise will run short if I put them in words. I admire my friend for patiently bearing with me despite my thousand faults and weaknesses… My friend has also been one of my motivating and influential factors in my recent accomplishments and has been a continuing source of inspiration.

It is a wonderful feeling to feel the presence of my friend always around me.

“A Million THANKS to you for never letting me down and a Billion THANKS for always pulling me back to life every time I have gone through nerve wrecking breaking points!!!”

:: TODAY ::

On a beautiful morning
Filled with sweet sunshine

I think of you and those moments
Those make me who I am today

It makes me smile to think of you
I close my eyes to remember you

And in my breath I can catch your scent
As it still steals my breath away…

I live each moment at a time
I don’t know what’s coming my way

All I know is I’m alive right now
Because I find you there beside me
Every time I think of you

I know I’ve got used to
Your presence in my life
But I also know I’ll have to let go
And wave at you as you walk away

I know my world will be breaking apart
I know my dreams are going to get washed away

But just to know that you are happy
I’d wipe my tears and smile at you
Today…

...sacrifice...

The trail of crimson blood
Taint the cold grey floor
Of my isolated chamber of
Wounded memories

As I remain shackled behind iron bars
To withhold myself
From reaching out to you
And disturb your happy moments
Now that you have
Been able to forget me
For quite some time

I bereave every moment of truth
I bleed every time I think of you

I sacrifice my emotions
I forgive those feelings
That were perhaps
Never meant to be for me

If only you knew
What you meant to me
You would not have
Let me bleed like this

But that you are gone
If you ever return
You would find your name
Engraved upon
The walls of my heart

You might look for me
Wanting to return to me
But it would have been too late
By then

I would have gone
Sacrificing my love
Leaving behind
A legacy of memories
In your name…

COURAGE

When you want to go
I seem to know
Where you are going
Without me

You want to hide yourself
From my searching eyes
You wish to run away
From me

I know that
You are in love
With someone
Who loves you
Even more

And if you fear
That I will heartbroken
If you dread that
I will be over

Then you are wrong

I may be blazing
Down to ashes
I may be staggering
To walk again

Because every time
I would think of you
Remembering the pleasant times
We lived through

You would still
Find me smiling
Through the rain
As I walk alone…

:: Isolation ::

Lonely hours are the best hours of life
Because...

It is the only time
That we are able to share

Our deepest secrets
With the most
Trusted person in the world

…

That is,
With our inner selves;
Our soul

"THANKSGIVING" - a dedication to a very special friend

There is actually very little that I can express today about my gratitude towards life the way it has helped me understand it.

I dedicate this very day in loving memory of a very special friend who I wish to thank from the bottom of my heart. I always hid my emotions within me concealing them from the outside world… but today I wish to admit the role that this special friend played in my life as a beacon of inspiration at times when I have often been alone and isolated.

I must admit that I could helplessly do nothing to hold things in place the way I had wished. However, I regret nothing as to me, those times spent meaningfully were some of the best moments of my life and I wish to live every day cherishing those memories with my head held high and braving a smile…

We often pray to Almighty to bless us with happiness and all the good things in life. This friend brought everything in my life and for some moments, I felt I was living beyond my dreams… everything that started to happen later seemed to have a heavenly glow in them as they began to unfold.

I am feeling so touched and emotionally stirred by this parting that I cannot express how lonely I have now become. I could sense that we would be parting today or tomorrow and I just could not bear to let go.

I consider this special friend as a heavenly blessing from above. All I can do is thank Almighty over and over again for blessing me with such a wonderful friend. Nothing would change my memories or my feelings. It is just that my respect has increased manifolds towards this special friend and I shall forever remain grateful and obliged.

I am so deeply shocked and shaken… that my eyes are brimming with tears in them and I feel I can hardly write any more.

“…I can never stop thanking you for what you truly mean to me…You shall never be forgotten…I am sure you know how much you shall be missed in sober silence every single day...I am so proud of you!"

Kazi


Friday, 01 January 2010